My Niche Passions

The best part of reality TV is that you learn something about the world around you. It might not be a documentary, strictly speaking, but it truly does teach life lessons. Like how in the latest episode of Lizard Lair I learned that a toaster than can sing one of seventy fun showtunes and act as a calculator really isn’t that useful. Maybe I didn’t know that before. Or when in the finale of The Great Australian Trade-Off that one guy whose name I forget ordered all of his wall lining from a guy on E-Buy and it turned out that it was full of asbestos. Whoops, awkward, don’t do that!

And now I’ve learned that if you want to buy property underneath the ocean, then you need the services of a buyers advocate, because it’s really hard to make any sort of complaints when you’re in international waters and the people who sold you the renovated sunken ship were actually pirates. So that’s already not good, but the oxygen sealant was really shoddy so June and Marcos were trying to call the emergency plumbers while standing on the sofa with the water flooding in all around them. See, that’s why you need to contact a buyers advocate to scout out the area and find out all the important stuff, like if it’s a good place to raise kids, if your house is west-facing to catch the sun, and if the property was previously inhabited by pirates who trashed the place and didn’t do their due diligence sealing it against the crushing ocean pressure.

Now I know that, because the latest episode of ‘Echolocation!’ taught me. I won’t make the same mistakes, I’ll contact some of the best property advocates Melbourne has to offer for help. I’ll ge the best advice from experts who know what they’re doing. I guess all that TV I watch is actually very useful after all.